Love Bombs

Some time in 2008

So this friend of a friend of a friend... and so on... had now become acceptant of the idea of
love being the number one priority in her life.
Because that's was all she ever wanted. Fucking love!
So she called me and said:
"You know that moment when you wake up and you feel like the whole world might be gone?
You think as soon as you step foot out of your bed there will be nothing but space and you will float away for ever?"
"You know... that moment when you look at your shadow and you wonder if it wishes it could just run the way you
should be running, but your ego is too big to realize that everything is NOT the way you want it to be?"
So she lost control of her mind, because she was addicted to the way she felt in her heart.

And she wanted to make sure she wouldn't loose that feeling of freedom and beauty.
It's always about love in her world.
Everything is always about love.
Something beautiful seems lovable.
Something lovable seems beautiful.
"Once upon a time there was a beautiful princess with blue hair.
She was the ruler of a great kingdom and she lived in a beautiful castle made of glass.
Day in and day out she would walk through the streets of her kingdom and make sure people were doing things
the way she thought was best. If something wasn't going her way she would scream so loud it would make glass shatter.
One day she woke up in the great bedroom of her beautiful castle made of glass and when she looked outside,
there was nothing left.k
The people had left and burned down the whole beautiful kingdom.
And she screamed. She screamed so loud it made the castle shatter into a million pieces and she was vanished
in the ruins of her own once so beautiful castle."
So this friend...
came to think that maybe things weren't supposed to be okay.
That maybe things should be difficult or they were nothing but lies.
And like when she accepted that she was living in denial,
she accepted that she didn't want to live in a fabricated castle made of glass and that the values she thought
were important had turned her into an evil dictator of her own mind.
She thought hard about how she could take down the dictator in her head and she decided that she needed to stop
letting her ego manipulate every step she takes in life.
And she was glad she took the time to think hard.
And when she explained to me the way she felt I thought:
"I mean, I am not no fucking philosopher, but I am pretty sure that it is important to remember
the values YOU give yourself. Not restrictions, but values and morals.
We know what we are taught by outsiders, and that's important to take into consideration.
But what about our own ideas?
Yea Yea, we all know ...     thou shalt not steal
and all that shit...
But what about the way you want to live?
What about the morals and values YOU believe in?
Not society or mom or dad or your husband or wife or brother or boss...
YOU!
People are easily manipulated. Even by their own egos.
And it is important to take time to think.
Or the little fascist dictator we all have in our heads is going to build himself a big beautiful castle made of
glass and throw the person we really are into a tiny cell and wait until we rot."
... to be continued...